I’m looking forward to my next move because it’s the first of a kind for me.   PseudoHR is moving on up to a big website in the city, a self hosted site.  Nothing against the freebie version of wordpress but its time to spread my wings, as they say.  I’ll have more room to spread out my thoughts and more creative control over the layout of the site, assuming HTML/CSS doesn’t kick my butt.

Come on over to the new site, www.pseudohr.com, and update your RSS feed or sign up for email updates; there are exciting things on the horizons and you don’t want to miss out on any of the fun.

I loved “Night Out In August”.  Not only did it give us a chance to share our ideas for product lines, services offered, marketing ideas but it gave us a voice to the CEO.

Sadly, when things started going south this was one of the first things to go.  It was greatly missed by all employees.

I found it an interesting observation; after the program ended, employee morale started declining, rapidly.  Employees felt their voice was unheard and many felt they didn’t know what was going on in company. I must admit I was one of those people – pre HR days.

Fast forward to present day….

I’ve considered presenting the same type plan to my current employer but I’m a bit hesitant.  The cost of the program can run rather high, especially when the department head count reaches 20.   I think it would be a great plan to increase employee engagement.

When employees see their ideas become reality, and they receive credit for the idea from the top, it is a huge motivator.  I think the cost would be worth it, the hard part is selling it to the Corporate types; to be included in next year’s budget of course.

Being at the mall in the middle of the day on a Friday is interesting.  Many of the stores were stocking up for the weekend so most of the staff was on the floor working like little bees.  Having worked retail myself, I know how comfortable you get in the store so I always find it interesting to listen the associates talk to each other.

So, how does this relate to HR?  If you work for a company that has interaction with the public, face to face, please coach your staff on what types of conversations they should and shouldn’t be having on the floor.

Example 1: The first store I went to brought the story telling likes of Barbara and Suzy (names changed to protect the absurd).  Barbara told Suzy the story of some guy she met last weekend that had never been married and said he was “saving himself for her”.  Now, Suzy has apparently been married and the conversation came up during the talk with her new love interest. Barbara thought this was hilarious and poked fun at Suzy’s love interest by saying “Suzy, you were supposed to save yourself for him but you’ve been deflowered and now he don’t want you”.

I cant make this stuff up people and I refuse to tell you the rest of the conversation because I don’t think its appropriate for print.

Example 2: The second store I visited was managed by a guy who wanted to be anywhere but in the store.  Dude was huffing and puffing with every action.  He was paged twice in the twenty minutes I was in the store. The second time “Manager needed at register” was heard, dude stood up and cussed like he thought he was a Navy man. He did blush when he saw me so at least he knew he’d made an error in judgment.  I get that he was frustrated but had I been his mother I would drug him by his ear to the soap section to wash his mouth.

I’m by no means offended by either of these scenarios, it takes a lot to offend me, but I can see how others might be.  When I worked retail, part of our new hire orientation was the bit about how to act professional on the sales floor.  These people clearly need another training session.

Have you worked retail and been through the same session? Have you encountered your own Barbara, Suzy or Navy Manager? Tell me your stories!

Pamela Allen is a student of Steve Boese at Rochester Institute of Technology. Pam is pursuing her Masters degree in Human Resources.  Pam had this to say about her class

I have only heard of blogs, but never posted anything or created one.  I had my first experience with Wikis.  With two kids involved in sports, going to school and working full time I basically have little time to do much of anything else.

Pam currently works at a large University Medical Center as a Department Administrator.  She says she is

in charge of personnel matters as well as financial oversight for a department of approximately 150 faculty, staff and students.  Basically, I have all of the responsibility, but no authority.

Please joining me welcoming Pam to the blogging universe, Pam take it away…

Letting staff go is never fun but it’s easier when its one on one because the employee should know its coming.  I have the misfortune of delivering the dreaded lay off speech next week to 20+ employees at my company. Given the state of the economy, I am saddened to see any one lose their main source of income, even if said income is not substantial.  Having said that, some of the employees in this group take up the majority of my time with issues which makes the situation bittersweet.

My question to the HR community, wonderful as you all are, is this; what is the best way to deliver the layoff speech to these employees?  For those that have done this, what did you use to help you cope with the situation the first time? Any advice you can offer to help me with this situation would be greatly appreciated.

At first I was baffled, what do you mean do we read your resume? But then I starting thinking, I don’t read every resume.  We have questions on our online applications to determine a candidate’s experience.  I use the questions to determine which candidates have the experience we are looking for and those that do not. Nine times out of ten, I will dismiss a candidate that does not have the experience I need based on those questions.

In my former life I did read every resume but that life was in the dark ages before I discovered the wonders of an applicant tracking system.

The one thing that will catch my eye and make me look at a candidate that does not have the experience I need, a cover letter addressed to me. Yeah, my own name catches my eye; I bet $10 you’re the same way.

I guess what it boils down to is if you have experience, list it on the application when asked and detail the results on your resume.

If you don’t have experience but are looking to enter the field, find out who the recruiter is and address a letter to that person.  Detail why you are looking to enter the field and how your previous experience might help you in your quest to enter said field.

For the other HR professionals reading this,

• What advice do you have for the person that asked the question “Does HR even read my resume?”
• What advice do you have for someone looking to enter a field in which they have no experience?

So, what are you still doing here? Go on, get out of here and go read the latest Carnival.

Keep a fresh suit or change of clothes.  You never know when something will happen that may require you changing out of the clothing you’re wearing.  In the haze of my morning funk I didn’t notice I put on pants with a “stain of unknown origin” on the back/bottom of a leg.  I was able to put on a clean pair b/c I kept spare pants at the office.  On the other hand, today, a co worker is walking around in soaking wet clothing because they got caught in the torrential downpour.  They have nothing to change into for the rest of the day.  They can’t go home and change b/c they live over an hour away.  Just make sure you take the spare clothes home and freshen them up every once in awhile, especially if you end up using them!

Great advice, especially if you live that far from the office.

So, what tip do I have for surviving workplace chaos?  Dental supplies. I keep spare dental floss in my desk, always have.  Having something stuck in my teeth keeps me from focusing on anything else so I keep a small spool in my desk.  I have been the lifesaver of many corn on the cob eaters; I live the south, its a stable for any meat and three joint.

What suggestions do you have for surviving workplace chaos?

I had a conversation with a candidate the other day that just made my day.  I called to offer the candidate a position at the rate of pay she was asking for and before accepting she asked a few questions about the start date, benefits, etc.  After answering her questions the reply I received I was “Wow, this is just so exciting; I would love to join your team”.  She was professional in her acceptance but yet you could hear the underlying excitement in her tone.  I emailed her all the paperwork and she promptly replied with signed paperwork.

By contrast, I offered a position to another candidate the day before which I have yet to hear back from after receiving a verbal acceptance.

Are you making job offers on a regular basis?

Tell me some of your stories; I want to hear the good and the bad.  Please feel free to call them Jane and John if you want to protect the guilty.

I spent most of my day reading performance reviews and by noon I suffered from mushy brain.

It’s been my experience that performance reviews only wreak havoc; managers hate them, employees don’t care for them and get stressed out.  Before I joined the cult that is HR, I didn’t care for performance review time.

My general theory is annual performance reviews should be outlawed.  Staff should be coached and managed on a regular basis.  I’ve preached the no surprises bit to managers for years but I still feel like I’m talking to a brick wall.

What are your thoughts on performance reviews? Hate them or love them?

The presenter for today’s meeting was from Behavioral Health Systems here in Birmingham Alabama (aka The Ham) and her topic of choice was Depression in the Workplace.  I know what you are thinking because I thought the same thing, snoozer. But it really wasn’t, the presenter was lively and tried her best to keep the information informative but not boring as hell.

What stood out for me was that many people suffer from depression but fear talking with the EAP or visiting a doctor because they are afraid of the potential stigma that comes along with being “depressed”.  One statistic indicated that the major cause of disabilities for people between 14 and 44 was depression.

Soap Box Warning!

I think at some point in our lives we all suffer from some level of depression/the blues, I’ll be the first to admit that I have.  If you know someone that suffers from depression, urge them to seek help from a qualified health care provider and not just some pill pusher.  Please let them know there is no “record” in your HR office that labels them as depressed and they won’t be first one the list for the next round of layoffs because they have sought treatment.

-end soap box